Sex Advice

Dear Dr. Locker: A couple I knew got arrested for having sex on a public bench. This made me wonder why do people want to have sex in public, anyway?!

Answer from Dr. Locker

People may choose to have sex in public for any number of reasons that are unique and specific to their situation. In general, here three common reasons for why sex in public is attractive to many people:

1) By having sex in public, people are experimenting with new sensations to keep sex incredibly interesting. We live in a world of constant stimulation from television, the Internet, music, and other sources. Having an exciting sex life is a constant challenge if you think it has to live up to the thrills that exist in our culture.

2) There are many people who want to do something completely unique to set themselves apart from those who their partner has had sex with before. When someone has had multiple partners before, their new partner may feel the urge to do something that no past partner had done with that person before – to “make their mark”. They want to feel as if sex is a special bonding experience, so they add the elements of risk and a completely unique experience.

3) Finally, doing anything risky brings on an adrenaline rush and increased heart rate. These feelings may enhance sexual sensation, since adrenaline increases blood flow to the muscles in the pelvic region. However, sexual arousal itself has the same effect of increasing adrenaline and heart rate, even if you are in your bed at home. So you can get super turned on when you are safely at home, and THEN feel the rush of adrenaline from your arousal, rather than feeling it BEFORE you become aroused. Remember, your focus can be forming a healthy relationship and sexual responsibility – not just a wild thrill.

Copyright © Dr. Sari Locker